Purveyor: We don’t know. Some legend sent this to us.
Menu Item: We’re calling it the VB Burger, for Very Beautiful.
Price: All we know is that longneck makes it a great value. Full stop.
Squawk: Do you have to ask?
Buaawk: Nothing. There is nothing not good about this.
Purveyor: Bennett Street Dairy, Bondi NSW, Australia
Menu Item: Hilda’s Buttermilk Fried Chicken on Lux Brioche
Price: $18.50 AUD
Squawk: We never thought it would happen, but there we were, stuffing our faces trying to find fault with this amazing burger, and we could not. Nothing. Sure, the place isn’t licensed, so no beer. Sure they got the “comes with chips” part wrong. Sure the unevenly weighted presentation with the two squishy pickles isn’t going to blow up on Instagram, but this burger is so good it overcomes all those things. The brioche is sweet – too sweet for most the burgers we’ve reviewed, but it is so perfectly matched with all the other innards, you can’t fault it. The smoked cheddar is fantastic all on it’s own, but factor in the way these guys get it melted to perfection with just the edges a bit burned and crunchy, and you can’t fault it. The Jalapeño Mayo has enough kick to warrant the name. We’d love more heat, but you can’t fault it. The rocket (aka rugula) and roast tomato do the job they’re there to do, it’s a good combo and you can’t fault it. And the house-made onion relish adds the perfect amount of moisture and tang to offset the aforementioned super sweet brioche, and you can’t fault it. Lastly the chicken is pure white meat, perfectly fried with just enough crunch, and without the excess oil that plagues so many other establishements, and you can’t fault it. Congrats to owner James Meek and Chef Cliff Baskin – Grandma Hilda would be proud.
“You can’t fault it.”
Buaawk: No beer. No chips. Pickles aren’t the best. A little bit expensive. And none of this matters.
(Sure this is some sort of Japanese fried chicken taco wanna be thingamabob, but still, this could our saviour when it come to making chicken burgers at home.)
Purveyor: Mother Clucker Food Truck, London UK
Menu Item: Cluckwich
Price: £9 (£10 w cheese)
Squawk: This is a fantastic looking food truck painted to look like a military vehicle, but is actually what appears to be an old ambulance. We randomly stumbled across this unit in the back streets of Shoreditch, and given the unique branding and etymological attitude, they felt like kindred spirits. Even though we were actually looking for a place to enjoy a late breakfast, we jumped at the chance to try their chicken burger. While we waited in line we overheard several conversations about this rig, and the consensus amongst them all was that this was one of the best chicken sandwiches in all of Londontown. In fact, according to our eavesdropping, they won “food truck of the year” recently. This is unverified as of this point in time, all we can tell you about is the chicken burger and experience we had.
First unusual thing we noticed was this one comes served on Texas Toast, which is really just white bread slices with some spices sprinkled carefully on top. Inside there is pickled peppers, iceberg lettuce, and a subtle lime mayo. We opted for cheese, obviously, which added an essential element although it wasn’t melted and seemed tossed on as more of an afterthought. Meat-wise they are very generous with the chicken thighs made with a nice crunch yielding to soft tender white meat. Their hot sauce had a nice heat and the pickled peppers gave it a nice bit of zing as well. Overall this one has the right balance of crispiness, moisture, and flavor for a really nice mouth feel and structural integrity.
Buaawk: Service, as expected in London was terrible, but these guys took it to another level. The attitude from the two overworked staff was almost as palpable as the food. With only 5 people in line in front of us it still took over 40 minutes to get our food. So, was it worth the wait and blatant disdain for customers? Sort of. One thing is for sure, they could’ve scored higher if it weren’t for that long, long wait and uncalled for surly attitude. As someone once said, it’s not enough to just be good at what you do, you have to be nice.
Purveyor: Bon Appétit, Magazine / Website
Menu Magazine Item: Fried Chicken Sandwich Recipe
Price: No fucking idea. You have to go buy all the ingredients yourself and then account for the value of your own time making the damn thing from scratch. Do the math, let us know.
Squawk: You get to choose the freshest, bestest ingredients. (Yeah we know “bestest” isn’t a word. Deal with it Shakespeare).
Buaawk: You have to make it your fucking self.
Rating: You tell us. We’re too busy for this shit. If you’re not, then submit a review.