WORLDWIDE CHICKEN BURGER APPRECIATION SOCIETY


Posts By Eran Thomson

Ba’s Best Fried Chicken Sandwich?

Purveyor: Bon Appétit, Magazine / Website

Menu Magazine Item: Fried Chicken Sandwich Recipe

Price: No fucking idea. You have to go buy all the ingredients yourself and then account for the value of your own time making the damn thing from scratch. Do the math, let us know.

Squawk: You get to choose the freshest, bestest ingredients. (Yeah we know “bestest” isn’t a word. Deal with it Shakespeare).

Buaawk: You have to make it your fucking self.

Rating: You tell us. We’re too busy for this shit. If you’re not, then submit a review.

 

NORTH BURGER

Purveyor: North Burger, Sydney NSW Australia (no website but you can find them on Bridge St.)

Menu Item: Buttermilk Fried Chicken Burger

Price: $13.50 with Fries

Squawk: We have a friend who has been telling us this place needs to jump to the top of our “To Try” list for months. In fact when they first discovered it for themselves they immediately told us they found a solid 9-10 – and possibly the Best Burger Awards Winner for 2015. Were they right? Read on fatty. Read on.

North Burger Sydney Bridge Street Holy Cluck Burger Reviews

Do not be fooled. This is not a real Chicken Burger. It’s plastic. Don’t ask us how we know.

First of all lets get one thing out into the open. This isn’t a chain, restaurant, pub or cafe. It’s a shithole-in-the-wall in a shithole of a food court in a shithole of a mall. All of which makes the fact that they serve up such a good burger even more amazing. We have a general rule about Mexican food if anyone cares, and that is that, generally, the worse looking the place, the better the food. So far none of the Holy-Cluck Reviewer Team have gotten sick from Mexican food. Water? Now that’s another story, but we digress. Point is, sometimes the worst looking places surprise you.

This burger comes with three different pieces of succulent fried chicken meat: leg, breast and thigh. Something for everyone. Especially if you’re hungry. The meat is juicy and crunchy and damn near perfect. Overall the burger has a nice balance of moistness without being drippy, so if you forget to snag some napkins, chances are you’ll still be able to shake hands with someone and not feel like a dick after you eat. Maybe just bump fists though to be safe. But again, we digress. The red cabbage and carrot slaw has the right texture and amount of mayo to make you think it just might be good for you.

And finally, the chips. North Burger has those nice crispy chips with that delicious golden coating – almost like a little rosti. We know these come frozen in a bag and that golden colour might not be real, but we don’t care. They’re nice. And they have a shaker of chook salt at the counter if you’re into that sort of thing.

North Burger Sydney Bridge Street Holy Cluck Burger Reviews

Just look at him (her?) go!

Buaawk: Considering this burger has no cheese or bacon, they’ve created quite a contender. Generally speaking we were impressed, however, their choice of that fake barbecue sauce added too much sweetness. This is a mistake we keep seeing people make. They do serve their own “House Hot Sauce,” and it’s nice for dipping your chips into, but the burger would be so much better with a little heat, as suggested by our fellow reviewer. El Yucateca red would’ve been perfect, which they allegedly have on hand most days, but not today. Maybe everyone used it up trying to mask out that fake BBQ sauce. Oh, and did we mention its in a shithole of a food court in a shithole of a mall? Yeah.

SPRECHEN SIE CHICKEN?

Chickenberg Germany

Surprisingly, there’s no Schnitzel.

Chicken berg Germany falafel bullshit

Nein. Just, nein.

Spotted this AMAZING and curious sign in Homeland Season 5, Episode 1 recently and well, now it seems we have a reason to go to Germany very shortly. Failing that, if any of our beloved Holy-Cluck readers in Deutschland would be interested in giving this place a shot and doing a review we would be most dankbar. From what we can tell on their Facebook page, Chickenberg has great signage and decor, but the fact that they’re pimping falafels hard gives us cause for concern. Hilfe!

CHARING CROSS HOTEL

Purveyor: Charing Cross Hotel, Waverly NSW, Australia

Menu Item: Fried Chicken Burger

Price: $19 AUD (+$3 for Chips/Fries)

Squawk: This pub used to be dire. Gross, dirty and full of professional drunks. So when a friend we hadn’t seen in a while suggested we meet there and that food is good, we we’re to say the least, surprised. And slightly worried about our friend. Turns out all that worry, like most worry, wasn’t worth the energy. The “Charo” has been renovated, and for the most part, very nicely. We loved the outdoor seating area, that as far as we could tell, didn’t cater to smokers who seem to have ruined outdoor seating at every other pub in Australia. We were sad when we got kicked out at 5:30pm when the outdoor area magically becomes part of their fine dining experience. Inside the thoughtful renovation continues with the highlight being a vintage game room with some great old arcade games.

Charing Cross Hotel Vintage Game Room - www.instagram.com/eranthomson

Don’t shoot the Gorilla – 20¢

But we digress. We know why you’re here and it ain’t to hear about vintage video games. The Charo’s fired chicken burger sounds good on the menu and our Waitress thoughtfully suggested we order it with bacon to which we (always) readily agree. A nice surprise was that when the burger arrived, not only was the bacon perfectly crispy, but someone in the kitchen had the brains to trim the fat off it. Seem obvious, but you’d be amazed how many places get this simple thing wrong. Another nice touch was the oversized, fresh leaf of Iceberg Lettuce which added a some additional crunch. We also appreciated the condiment shelf which had all the usual suspects along with some new sauces we hadn’t seen before from Lillie’s. They are all mostly for red meat (BBQ), but still, being the sauce aficionado’s we are (and with our Founder having gone to school in North Carolina, aka BBQ Country) it was a welcome surprise to see some new sauces on the shelf.

Buaawk: First the burger: The roll was way too sweet, more like a marshmallow than a brioche. We like sweet buns on our women, not our burgers, and this one bummed us out. The chicken was fried thigh meat and was supremely neutral in flavour, texture and appearance. There’s no special attention here to the batter or spices and its a major flaw. Also the portion of meat was on the small side, and there wasn’t enough bird to fill the bun. We later discovered this wasn’t always the case as a late arrival’s burger was much better proportioned. So they lose points for inconsistency.

Now the venue. While the new renovation is great, two things bring it down. One is the noise. Even with the few acoustic tiles in the ceiling the place is annoying loud which turns mealtime conversation with friends into a shouting match. Add in the multiple TV’s and plethora of wobbly, aforementioned, professional (loud mouthed) drunks and it almost makes us not want to come back. The second thing is the staff. Jeez, they act like they’re doing you a huge favour when you order. Anything. Get over yourselves.

Bonus Points: Beer selection, vintage game room, nice renovation to what used to be a crap pub.

 – HC

WEST 4TH & JANE BAR

Purveyor: West 4th and Jane, Santa Monica, CA USA

Menu Item: BLTAC*

Price: $12 USD

Squawk: This place is a bit of a sleeper. Not only is it hiding in plain sight smack dab in the middle of Santa Monica, but its poor signage speaks to the unpretentious attitude of pretty much everyone who works and visits here. In a city full of lip and boob job bimbos and egocentric fools handing out “Executive Producer” business cards to anyone who will listen to their BS, West 4th & Jane is a bit of an oasis. Great beers and lots of them on tap. And a surprisingly good chicken sandwich. The bacon on this one comes crispy without you even having to ask for it that way. Nice. The side of pickles is another nice touch, but there’s still plenty of room on that rectangular plate for some fries (Hint). And they got a great hot sauce selection too. Special shout our to our friends at the WestSide Comedy Theater for turning us onto this place

Buaawk: You’ve read it here before, but no chips/fries always bums us out. Yes, we know they’re bad for you and yes, we still want’em. We’re also not so sure about the shredded kale – and we generally enjoy kale, just not so much on a burger – in this case we felt it added a little too much chewiness. We do love chargrilled chicken, but this one was a bit dry. Thankfully their great beer list helps it go down easy.

Bonus Points: Beer selection, unpretentiousness, good music at a level where you can still enjoy it and still have a conversation without shouting.

*In case you didn’t know, that’s and acronym for Bacon, Lettuce, Tomato, Avocado, Chicken

 – HC